#72.

simba texted and told me that our results are gonna be posted to our lovely homes tomorrow. and he's quite positive that the cgpa's gonna be included in it, so. tomorrow is doomsday! anyway, i've had quite a dramatic moment the other night. when i suddenly broke down and told my mom i had no confidence in doing actuarial science, and that i wanted to switch to accounting. where i can actually do better. its not that its not hard, but then, its def easier. i'd rather do something that i can pour my best in, rather than doing something that i might not be able to achieve. mom almost enrolled me into sunway. anyway, after all the dramas mom told me she has faith in me (with lots of elaborations full of motherly love), and i decided to give myself a second chance and work my ass off for my second semester and. there. end of drama. BUT. my mom still doesnt know my cgpa. and i'll let her down tomorrow. im ready to get some scolding, but what i cant stand most. is the disappointment on her face tomorrow. i dont care if she doesnt let me join the trip, all i know is. this will be the last time. i swear. i cant let my mom down again. and my dad. i love my parents i really do. i wanna make them proud. i wanna be successful one day and my parents to tell the whole world, yes, this is my daughter.

just now popo told me, 愿主保佑你. yes, dear Lord please watch after everyone who loves me. no more distractions, just one direction. walk all the way to the end. and make everyone proud.